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Coffee Chat Series: The Impact of Grief on the Brain and Heart

unboxedgrief

Hey there, coffee enthusiasts and empathetic souls! Welcome back to another heartfelt session of our Coffee Chat Series here at Unboxed Grief. Today, we’re diving into a topic that may feel a bit heavy—kind of like that Monday morning triple shot espresso—but one we all experience at some point: grief. So, pour yourself a cozy cup, settle in, and let’s talk about the surprising ways grief impacts our bodies, particularly the brain and heart.


A Historical Sip: Grief Through the Ages

Did you know that long before we had terms like "stress" or "psychosomatic responses," people still understood the profound connection between grief and the body? Ancient Egyptians, for instance, believed the heart was the epicenter of emotion. They’d often reference a "broken heart" in their hieroglyphics. They didn’t have cardiologists to explain what was happening, but they instinctively knew that the heartfelt pain just as much as the mind.


Flash forward a few thousand years, and modern science has finally caught up to what our ancient ancestors always knew. Grief isn’t just a feeling—it’s a full-body experience. You’re not just sad; you’re mentally, emotionally, and physically affected.


Grief on the Brain: When Memory and Sleep Go on Vacation

When you're deep in the throes of grief, it might feel like your brain has gone on a coffee break without telling you. Forgetting things? Losing focus? That’s because grief affects our brain’s executive functions—the parts responsible for memory, attention, and decision-making. The hippocampus, which manages our memories, can shrink during periods of prolonged stress or grief. You may even experience sleep disturbances, tossing and turning at 3 AM, wondering if you'll ever get some rest. It's not all in your head—well, technically it is, but you get the idea!


This cognitive fog is your brain’s way of coping with an overwhelming emotional load. So, don’t beat yourself up if you’re struggling to recall what day it is or why you walked into the kitchen for the third time without grabbing the coffee you swore you needed.


The Heartbreak is Real: Grief’s Impact on the Cardiovascular System

And then, there's the heart. Remember when people would say, "I’m heartbroken"? Well, they’re not being melodramatic. Grief can quite literally break your heart. There’s a condition called broken heart syndrome (no, this isn’t a sappy rom-com, it’s real), also known as stress-induced cardiomyopathy. It mimics the symptoms of a heart attack, and while it's usually temporary, it’s a reminder that grief doesn’t just tug at your heartstrings—it yanks them.

According to a study by Kanno (2012), people who experience intense grief are at a higher risk for this condition, which affects the way the heart muscles pump, even though there’s no blockage like in a typical heart attack. It’s the body's way of saying, "Hey, I’m overwhelmed, too!"


So, What Can You Do? A Bit of Advice with Your Coffee

First things first: be kind to yourself. Grief is hard enough without us adding more pressure to "get over it" or "snap out of it." If your body is waving the white flag, it’s a sign to slow down.

Mindfulness and meditation are great places to start. You don’t need to transform into a Zen monk overnight, but setting aside just a few minutes a day to sit quietly, focus on your breath, and be can work wonders. Think of it as a way to brew a little peace amidst the chaos.


If you’re more of an action-oriented person, physical activity can be a lifesaver (and no, I don’t mean training for a marathon, unless you’re into that sort of thing!). Even a short walk or light stretching can help release endorphins, those feel-good chemicals that your brain is probably running low on during this time.


And lastly, if those physical symptoms persist—whether it’s chest tightness, sleeplessness, or brain fog—please don’t hesitate to seek professional help. Doctors, therapists, and support groups exist to help you navigate these stormy seas. Your grief doesn’t have to be something you carry alone.


Resources to Keep You Going

Do you feel like you want to dive deeper into how grief affects the body? You’re in luck! Here are a few great resources to check out as you sip your next cup:

  • Bessel van der Kolk’s The Body Keeps the Score is a fantastic read that explains how trauma, including grief, can leave its mark on our physical health.

  • The American Heart Association’s website (heart.org) offers excellent insights on how grief can affect the heart, including information on broken heart syndrome.

  • Over at Psychology Today (psychologytoday.com), you’ll find a treasure trove of articles about the emotional and cognitive impact of grief. Perfect for those late-night Google searches when your brain won’t shut off.


If you're more of a group person, many hospitals have cardiac support groups that can also be incredibly helpful for those coping with heart-related grief issues. Sometimes, just knowing you're not alone can make all the difference.


As We Wrap Up Our Chat…

Remember, grief is a journey, not a destination. It takes time, it takes patience, and it takes a whole lot of self-compassion. Whether your heart feels like it's breaking, your brain is scattered, or you’re just trying to make sense of it all, know that you’re not alone on this ride. And if nothing else, there’s always a warm cup of coffee here to help soothe the soul.


Take a deep breath and another sip—together, we’ll get through it.


At Unboxed Grief, we understand that grief is a deeply personal journey, and no two paths look the same. That's why we offer grief support groups and 1:1 sessions to walk alongside you, helping you navigate the ups, downs, and everything in between. We’d be honored to be a part of your healing process, offering a compassionate, non-judgmental space where you can feel heard and supported. As Ram Dass so beautifully said, "We're all just walking each other home," and we’re here to be that steady companion, offering warmth and guidance as you take each step forward.


Until next time, take care of yourselves and your hearts, friends.






References

Kanno, H. (2012). Broken heart syndrome. Journal of Cardiology, 59(3), 192-196.

Van der Kolk, B. (2014). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Books.





Disclaimer: The author of this blog is not a licensed practitioner, therapist, or medical doctor. The information provided is based on research and personal experience and is intended for informational and supportive purposes only. If you are experiencing physical or emotional symptoms of grief that are impacting your health, we strongly recommend consulting with a licensed healthcare provider, therapist, or medical professional for clinical evaluation and appropriate intervention. Always seek professional advice before making decisions regarding your mental or physical well-being.





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