
You’ve probably felt it at some point: a shared sadness that doesn’t seem to belong to you alone, a heaviness that hangs in the air even when your personal life seems fine. Maybe it was during a major event that shook the world, or perhaps after seeing the heartbreak in your community. This shared sorrow is called collective grief—an experience of loss that doesn’t just impact one person but resonates through an entire group, society, or even the world.
What Is Collective Grief?
Collective grief is, at its core, a shared experience of loss that affects a group on a societal, cultural, or even global level. Instead of being tied to individual circumstances, collective grief stems from events or circumstances that impact many people at once. These events—think natural disasters, pandemics, or mass tragedies—create a shared emotional response as we all grapple with the effects of loss, fear, and uncertainty together (Kessler, 2020).
A recent example of collective grief would be the widespread sorrow following the tragic fires in Maui, Hawaii, which destroyed homes, displaced families, and disrupted an entire community (Schaefers, 2023). This catastrophe brought people around the world together in mourning—not just for lost lives, but for the lost culture, memories, and history that the fires swept away. Many who have never set foot in Hawaii felt the weight of this tragedy, watching images of the fires and reading about the devastation as though it were their own.
Why Should We Care About Collective Grief?
You might think, “Why should I take on collective grief? I’ve got enough on my plate!” And you’re not wrong—life is hard enough as it is. But understanding and acknowledging collective grief is important because, without awareness, it can quietly pile up, leading to feelings of burnout, anxiety, and helplessness. This type of grief is like a subtle, extra layer on the usual emotional sandwich, and if we ignore it, it can lead to what psychologists call compassion fatigue—that sense of exhaustion and emotional numbness we feel when we can’t handle any more tragedy (Figley, 1995).
Collective grief also binds us together in solidarity. When we’re able to recognize and share in these moments, it connects us with others who are experiencing similar emotions, fostering community and shared resilience. It’s a reminder that we’re all in this big, messy world together, even when we’re apart.
Managing Collective Grief (So It Doesn’t Manage You!)
So, how can we navigate this complicated and often invisible emotional burden without letting it consume us? Here are some simple, actionable steps to help you stay grounded, balanced, and compassionate to yourself as you acknowledge and process collective grief.
1. Limit Your Media Intake—The World Will Keep Turning!
While it’s good to stay informed, the constant flood of information can sometimes turn the volume up on our grief. Give yourself permission to take breaks from the news and social media. Set specific times each day to check updates and stick to them. After all, you don’t need a 24/7 feed of heartbreak to stay informed (Smith et al., 2021).
2. Talk About It—Yes, Even the Sad Parts!
Find people you trust to talk about what you’re feeling. Collective grief often feels like it needs an outlet and talking it through can lighten the load. Your friend, family member, or even a grief support group can be that safe space. Sharing your emotions might even help others open up, too—it’s like group therapy without the daunting couch.
3. Engage in Community—Find Your Tribe
When grief affects a group, sometimes the best way to cope is together. If you’re grieving a large-scale event, find ways to support others impacted by it. Join local volunteer efforts, support organizations helping those affected, or even participate in online communities that share updates and stories of resilience. Acts of service, no matter how small, can provide a sense of purpose and connection (American Psychological Association, 2019).
4. Self-Care—Make It Non-Negotiable
This isn’t the time to skip out on self-care routines. Whether it’s exercise, hobbies, or simply resting, make self-care part of your daily routine. Remember, it’s okay to take a step back and recharge. After all, even superheroes need a day off (yes, even you, Wonder Woman) (Wright, 2022).
5. Mindful Reflection—Check In with Yourself Regularly
Be mindful of your own limits. You might feel like you can’t or shouldn’t grieve something you weren’t directly involved in but remember grief isn’t always logical. Journaling can help you process what’s going on internally, giving you a place to reflect on how you’re feeling without judgment. You may find it helps clarify your emotions, giving you a better understanding of the weight you’re carrying (Thompson, 2018).
Wrapping It Up: Unboxing Grief Together
Collective grief may not be the first thing we think about when faced with a tragedy affecting others, but it’s a powerful and often necessary response. When we acknowledge it, give ourselves grace, and reach out to others, we can navigate these difficult moments with resilience and compassion. And remember, it’s okay to smile, laugh, and embrace joy even when sadness surrounds us. Sometimes, it’s the very best medicine.
References
American Psychological Association. (2019). Building resilience. Retrieved from https://www.apa.org/topics/resilience
Figley, C. R. (1995). Compassion fatigue: Coping with secondary traumatic stress disorder in those who treat the traumatized. Brunner/Mazel.
Kessler, D. (2020). Finding meaning: The sixth stage of grief. Scribner.
Schaefers, A. (2023). Impact of Maui fires and the road to recovery. Honolulu Star-Advertiser.
Smith, J., Johnson, R., & Lee, M. (2021). Mental health impacts of media exposure during collective crises. Journal of Media Psychology, 30(2), 245–259.
Thompson, R. (2018). Reflective journaling as a strategy for emotional processing in grief counseling. Journal of Humanistic Therapy, 12(1), 112–119.
Wright, S. (2022). Self-care for the emotionally overwhelmed. Wellness Press.
At Unboxed Grief, we understand that grief is a deeply personal journey, and no two paths look the same. That's why we offer grief support groups and 1:1 session to walk alongside you, helping you navigate the ups, downs, and everything in between. We’d be honored to be a part of your healing process, offering a compassionate, non-judgmental space where you can feel heard and supported. As Ram Dass so beautifully said, "We're all just walking each other home," and we’re here to be that steady companion, offering warmth and guidance as you take each step forward.
Disclaimer: The author of this blog is not a licensed practitioner, therapist, or medical doctor. The information provided is based on research and personal experience and is intended for informational and supportive purposes only. If you are experiencing physical or emotional symptoms of grief that are impacting your health, we strongly recommend consulting with a licensed healthcare provider, therapist, or medical professional for clinical evaluation and appropriate intervention. Always seek professional advice before making decisions regarding your mental or physical well-being.
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